The online beauty world got better when Polly Blitzer, formerly of InStyle and Marie Claire, launched the online magazine, Beauty Blitz. Polly has seen great success in her career, but just recently her personal life got even better with the birth of her twin sons, Miles and Sam. As a mom to four sons, I can completely relate to being the only female in a house of testosterone, but also some of the stressors that come with being a new mom (Polly has twins…I have a son with Aspergers.) New moms are always getting advice, some good and some that make us role our eyes (or at least I did when someone told me that the way she used to keep her kids in line in the 50’s was to tie them to a tree…but I digress.) This letter is to Polly to encourage her in her new role as mommy, but I’m sure it’s something that all moms can relate to.
1. Keep a baby facecloth handy. When changing diapers, it’s important to always keep a baby facecloth nearby to cover those boy parts. I’m pretty sure you’ve already experienced what can happen when cold air hits them in an open diaper (or no diaper at all.) The stream of water a fire hose sprays will pale in comparison to twin streams.
2. Get on a schedule. This is not only important for you, but for the babies too. It will help get you into a routine where you can plan your time better. There’s nothing worse than walking out the door for a lunch date when suddenly the choir starts singing that they are hungry! Speaking for myself, if I knew my boys ate at 12, I would plan a 1pm lunch since they would always sleep after eating and that would make for a peaceful and relaxing time.
3. Utilize your support system. If friends or family offer help, take it! Sometimes we shy away from it because we want to look like we can handle it (hey if you can handle being at the helm of Beauty Blitz, twins should be a piece of cake right? Um, no.) Whether it’s to watch the boys so you can nap or to pick up some of their necessities at the store, never say no.
4. Don’t forget your husband. When you bring new life into the world, it’s hard not to entirely focus on them (ooh shiny, sparkly). Suddenly our roles as wife shifts to mother and that takes precedence over everything. I remember as a new mom, it was hard to balance those roles AND work. Throwing a third role into the mix is like going from Ring Master to juggler in the circus. The transition is not always easy. Plan a date night…even if that means eating a late dinner and watching a movie in your living room once the boys are asleep. Time together alone is so vital.
5. Make time for you. This, to me, is the MOST important and one of the reasons I started A Girl’s Gotta Spa! way back in 2005. As the saying goes “if mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” It’s true. Sleep deprived nights, inability to figure out why the boys are crying, discovering new muscles in your back that are screaming in pain from holding them, and the change in life as usual (although a very GOOD change) will challenge you mentally in ways you never thought possible. Just 5 minutes for you will do a world of good. Whether it’s creating a spa experience when you have to shower (put the lights low, light some candles, break out your most fragrant and relaxing bath and body products…) to getting out of the house for a trip to the salon or lunch with a friend, when you get that time to just breathe without spit up on your clothes, without a peeing fountain and to not actually have a conversation about how much your boys pooped in a day (yes that actually becomes standard conversation from here on out) — you will not believe how refreshed you feel and suddenly have the ability to tackle anything.
Polly, there is nothing more rewarding than being a mom. It makes you realize you have a bigger purpose and more important role in this world. It can be tough no doubt, but it is always worth it.
If you’re a mom and have some advice or tips, please share them in the comments!
*Photo Credit: Ana Schechter